I think we humans have an inbuilt, instinctive sense that
allows us to discern rhythmic patterns. It,
almost more than anything, allows us to move accordingly, establishing key
moments to do things (say, raising your arm John Travolta like to the heavens)
that don’t occur at ridiculous times on the dance floor. Thus,
the key to dancing for me, whether voluntarily or not, has always been the
beat. It provides me with the necessary aural directions; when to move my feet,
arms, torso etc. On the dance floor I get into the beat,
recognise it, understand its patterns and plot out in my mind where my various
body parts are going to go.
This is where my problems with “dance” music begin. The beat is so persistent, so unyielding, so unrelenting,
thump, thump, thump, boom, boom, boom, doof, doof, doof, that I experience a
complete and utter sense of disorientation.
My brain shuts down, unable to detect anything in the beat that makes me
want to sway in time to it. I will then adopt
a frustrated stance on the dance floor as I literally don’t know how to
move. Invariably I have to account for my
presence there and instinctively adopt the headbangers stance and thrust my head up and
down. This is also a visible sign to hardened
clubbers who immediately understand my predicament. Or at least that’s what I’ve convinced
myself. Judging from people I’ve seen moving to “dance”
music, I suspect that they’ve either ignored the beat altogether (making for
some bizarre scenes on the dancefloor) or have taken such copious amounts of alcohol
or drugs that they are dancing to a different beat completely.
Unless “M”, to whom dancing comes naturally and gracefully, is
dragging me onto a dancefloor, something far more fundamental needs to occur
before I’ll even consider an expedition there. Basically there has to be something about the
music that moves me emotionally to want to dance and this obviously has to do
with the quality of the music being played.
This is my other problem with a lot of “dance” music; it’s complete and utter
anonymity. For example, neighbours near
my place, traditionally have a New Year’s Eve do each year, although mercifully
we were spared one this year. Their
choice of music is “doof doof” my term (and probably many others) for exactly
the type of anonymous relentless sound that I have in mind here. It is largely instrumental, sounds like its
being churned out of a computer and lacks any form of soul or emotion. Above everything else it has a relentless pile
driving beat that never seems to vary or even stop; most of the time I have trouble
even distinguishing between songs.
I remember at one party a few years ago a period of audible
silence after which Daft Punk’s wonderful One More Time was played before more
silence and the “doof doof” seemingly restarting at the point it was before it
was rudely interrupted. The Daft Punk
track was a blissful relief that neatly encapsulated the difference. There are lyrics to the song and so a human
(if electronically manipulated) voice but more importantly was able to convey a
sense of joy and humanity that the “doof doof” could never hope to match.
As this anecdote reveals there is dance music that I
actually like and which will make me move.
And it is not just onto the dancefloor.
Over the years I’ve found that the relentless beats, blips and beeps
provide a wonderful backdrop when I’m faced with a task of a repetitious nature. This was the case today, as I was faced with
a far bit of data inputting, double checking and basic accounting. In this environment I’m able to get my mental
faculties to operate in an orderly, regimented manner and I’ve found that this
form of music actually helps me deal with this scenario. This is not heaping false praise on any of
the artists or the recordings below. Look
at it this way, they are all records that make me move whether on the
dancefloor or, in a completely unintended way, at work.
(177) The Crystal
Method – Vegas
This is one of my favourite dance albums, a sensational
rendering of what is probably a totally digital soundscape but invested with
memorable tunes and enough vocal work to keep you thinking. It starts off with their original take on
Trip Like I Do, one of the more average tracks here but lifted into the
stratosphere when reworked by Filter for the soundtrack of Spawn. All of the up tempo numbers – Busy Child,
Keep Hope Alive and its surging intertwining with Vapour Trail and Now Is The
Time – are all sensational. The
remaining tracks provide some light and shade and reductions in the tempo.
(178) The Chemical Brothers
– We Are The Night
Instead of choosing one of the better known albums such as
Dig Your Own Hole or Surrender, I opted for this lower profile release. It is quite a diverse albums encompassing the
traditional Chemical Brothers attack on tracks like Do It Again, All Rights
Reserved, a couple of tracks which betray quite a debt to Kraftwerk (Saturate
and Das Spiegel) and even a track that could be termed a novelty number. The latter is Salmon Dance with hilarious
instructions courtesy of Fatlip.
(179) Mylo – Destroy Rock
& Roll
Mylo is the stage name for a Scottish musician and record
producer named Myles MacInnes. This is
effectively is only commercially released album which consists mostly of
chilled out tunes built on a range of intriguing samples. In My Arms is arguably the most recognisable
of these being constructed from Kym Carnes’ Bette Davis Eyes but the pick is
very nearly the magisterial Need You Tonite
which uses, of all tunes, Judie Tzuke’s Stay With Me Til Dawn . But absolutely everything is overshadowed by
the title track which uses what sounds like an American preacher praying for
the destruction of Rock & Roll, including such unlikely acts as Men At Work
and Band Aid in addition to the usual suspects.
Listen also to how the preacher mispronounces some of the acts.
(180) Fatboy Slim –
Better Living Through Chemistry
If only all instrumental dance albums could sound like
this. This was Norman Cook’s debut album
as the Fatboy and I think he’s yet to beat it, You’ve Come A Long Way Baby and
its host of singles and videos included.
Every track is based on a pounding beat but all have their own
personality. Song For Lindy, Going Out
Of My Head (sampling a cover of The Who’s I Can’t Explain), and Punk To Funk
are the highlights but really any track could have been selected.
(181) The Prodigy –
The Fate Of The Land
This is almost critic proof given the existence of so many iconic
tracks including Smack My Bitch Up, Breathe, Firestarter and Cimbatize. The closing track Fuel My Fire samples The
Cosmic Psychos Last Cause to great effect as well as providing Bill Walsh with
what I hope are considerable well deserved royalties.
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